ADEDS 2016 MLB All-Swaggy Team

The crack research department at ADEDS has spent the entire year documenting and charting the copacetic manneurisms and fresh-to-death idiosynracies of majorly Major League Baseball players.

We did that, so you won't have to.

Only 10 can make a top 10 we would be remiss if we didn't mention these fine ball players and all-star level swaggicians:

Melvin Upton, Jr., OF, Toronto Blue Jays

The player formerly known as B.J. "Bossman Jr." Upton ain't soft now that he goes by Melvin.  Adding the Jr. to your name is a trendy thing but not for Bossman.  He'll still back hand a trick if he has to.
Always has, always will.

Bryce Harper, OF, Washington Nationals

Bryce had a tough year at the plate but he definitely didn't struggle in the hair and beard department.
To be expected. 

Jose Altuve, 2B, Houston Astros

Baseball's Mighty Mouse.
It doesn't matter that his teammates have to bend down to celebrate with him; the joy and grit in which he plays with is unmatched. 

Jayson Werth, OF, Washington Nationals

Classic lumberjack here.
If Paul Bunyan and Jesus had a child, his name would be Jayson Werth.

Brett Lawrie, IF, Chicago White Sox

Brett is already one of the most tatted players in the MLB, and has shown us a strong Oakley frame game over the years. But up the ante with a 'vampire fangs' mouthguard??
Sure. Why not?

Mookie Betts, OF, Boston Red Sox

Gold Cuban link chunk chain plus O'Shea Jackson scowl circa 1992.
This man is a legend. 

Javier Baez, 2B, Chicago Cubs

It's pretty much mandatory that the swaggiest Puerto Rican player be on this team, and in 2016, Javy was that guy.  The retro Jordan 1 custom cleats pictured here only made it a cinch.

Brandon Crawford, SS, San Francisco Giants

Classic Son's of Anarchy.
Those black batting gloves he uses for clutch hitting are probably the same one's he uses to clutch the throttle on his Harley.

David Ortiz, DH, Boston Red Sox

It's Papi's world and we're just living in it.

Noah Syndergaard, P, New York Mets

His nickname is Thor, and it's not just because of his Scandinavian features, and the fact that his fastball hammers the strike zone with the force of Mjölnir.
Actually, nevermind.
It is.

Franciso Lindor, SS, Cleveland Indians

Going with multiple rosary beads over multiple gold chains is a nice touch.  Also, he is the first player in MLB history to still look cool while playing in stirrups.

David Ross, C, Chicago Cubs

The enforcer.
If manager Joe Maddon is the mad scientist alà Walter White, then David Ross is Mike Ehrmantrout.

Josh Donaldson, 3B, Toronto Blue Jays

Classic country boy redneck.
They should let Donaldson play in a mesh trucker hat and deer hunting camo.
He'd still hit 450-foot homers.

Johnny Cueto, P, San Francisco Giants

Besides honing about 15 different deliveries, including the vaunted "shimmy", Cueto's dreadlocks and Bubble Yum game give him an heir of nonchalance on a scale that no mere mortal can even comprehend as attainable.

That's it.
Feel like someone got snubbed?
Feel free to admonish me in the comments.
Also any emerging candidates for next year leave in the comments.  Might help with a preseason All-Swaggy team.